Embrace It

I didn't even realize until I got on Facebook this morning. Today is Alex's birthday.

I met Alex last summer at bible camp. He was tall, lanky kid, all arms and legs. He had a sarcastic sense of humor, and loved to sing and dance with all his might. He was kind of quiet, but always made everyone laugh.

Last year today, I was at bible camp with Alex. It was his 16th birthday, and everyone celebrated with him. Kids blew up balloons and decorated the dining hall. A cake was made, and we sang. The love in that room was obvious.

A few months passed. And suddenly Alex was no longer with us.

A service team was visiting the camp to help with some much needed repairs. Alex was part of the group of local kids that joined them. One afternoon after a long few days of work, the kids took the team to swim in Lake Superior. The current came in, and two boys were lost in it. Alex left the beach in a bag that day.

I find myself remembering Alex today, on what would have been his 17th birthday. I only knew him for a few months, but the joy he injected into my life was apparent. His spirit was contagious, and the community felt the loss intensely.

The loss of Alex reminds me how short life really is. How fragile it is. And even more, how important is is to live intentionally. I find myself in tears today, just as I was the day he died. Life is SO short. And it can be gone in an instant.

I know I could live a long life, and die peacefully in old age. I know I could get in the car today and never come home. But however long I'm allowed to live on this Earth, I don't want to regret a moment. Not one thing. Events like this are hard to stomach, but I'm thankful for the reminder to live each day like it's my last. I need it, because I take life for granted. So I don't want to push the pain away, I want to embrace it.

So I wished Alex happy birthday on his facebook wall. I told him I remembered being with him last year and that party we had. And I embraced the pain.